Asahi: Taka soap opera

["Rowan" <rowan@juryo.com>]

http://www.asahi.com/english/sports/K2002093000323.html

Taka soap opera combines intrigue, scandal, romance, tragedy and triumph 

So you think there aren't any really juicy Japanese TV soaps out there, huh?

Wrong! You must not have been watching the recently televised mini-series ``As Taka Turns'' (aka sumo's September tournament featuring yokozuna Takanohana).

It had all of the basic elements of a saucy soap in spades-intrigue, tragedy, romance, scandal and triumph.

First, the INTRIGUE:

* Was Takanohana competing just so he could retire part way into the basho as a perfect prelude to the perfunctory beaucoup boohoos?

* What was one to make of his demeanor transformation early on in the basho? Taka went from his normally non-plussed countenance to an uncharacteristic huffing-and-puffing bravado that smacked of whistling past the graveyard-was he trying to convince others that he still had it? Or himself?

* And then there were his strange, heretofore unseen pre-bout walkway histrionics-they included tai-chi type breathing accompanied by exercises that looked like underwater breaststrokes without the water. His antics screamed for ``Twilight Zone'' theme music accompaniment.

* Then there was the matter of how many wins Takanohana would need to fight off forced retirement. Some said, because he was gone so long, only eight. Others said as many as 11 or 12 was mandatory. Who or what was one to believe?

* There was no way of finding out about the aforementioned intrigue either, because Taka pulled a Garbo and gave the media the silent treatment.

Next, the TRAGEDY:

* Early on, the Kokugikan was packed with people-many of them the type that slow down to look at car wrecks-in case a yokozuna's career died that day. As it turned out, it was merely a near-death experience. Midway through the basho, when it was obvious Taka had survived, there were the usual large blocks of empty seats upstairs.

Now for the ROMANCE:

Tennis star Serena Williams, in town for the Princess Cup, attended sumo and reportedly went ga-ga over Taka. But she kept her distance because he is, after-all, a semi-happily married man (the tabloids have been all too happy to tell us about the yokozuna's marital travails).

And of course what good soap isn't loaded with SCANDAL:

* First, there were the reports in the Japanese sports dailies that the surgeon who repaired Takanohana's injured knee is your basic Duck L'Orange-a French quack. The sports rags claimed Ducky wasn't even listed in the physicians directory.

* Then there were the whispers that, thanks to his oyakata dad-a JSA member-he was paired with custom-made cupcakes to fight the first week. His early opponents were all suspiciously suited for Taka's style-guys who didn't move too much and would be there for the belt gripping.

Finally, though, there was TRIUMPH:

* Well, make that semi-triumph. Taka went from fighting for sumo survival to fighting for the Emperor's Cup. His dohyo sense and lower body stability carried him to a final day, winner-take-all showdown with fellow yokozuna Musashimaru. Alas, he was overpowered by Maru.

But aren't all good soaps open-ended? We thus find Taka still pursuing that miracle yusho. Sort of a Lazarus does the dohyo.

``Days of Our Lives?'' Drivel! ``Guiding Light''? They pale in comparison to ``As Taka Turns,'' returning to the tube Nov. 10th.

(09/30)


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