Re: Sumo World?

["J. Douglas" <jdouglas@nyc.rr.com>]

I could have upgraded my mother's wheelchair (new inner-tubes for the tires)
with the 35.00 but NOOOOOOOOO, I had to go and re-subscribe to Sumo World.
In the past,  as each day came closer to the Basho I would tremble and shake
as I approached my mailbox, nervously placing my key in upside down, then
correctly, finally opening the box with desperation.  If the magazine was
actually there I would tear into my apartment, deaf to the sounds of my many
hungry children.  I locked myself in my room to begin my Sumo World ritual:
1.  Find all the spelling errors
2.  Find all the grammatical errors
3.  Find all the factual errors
4.  Look for the hidden message that I heard Clyde buried in each issue that
could possibly win you a trip to Japan

If the kids came to my door I would roll it up like a newspaper and threaten
to "doggie spank"  them on the nose if they didn't go away.

This could last hours, even days, especially if the Basho had already begun
and I would try to attach the correct names with the faces in the magazine.

Now an entire Basho has taken place and without the magazine to face-match I
have had to make up shikonas for the new guys I'm not familiar with.
There's Oogieboogie and  HideyHoHo.

Curse you Clyde.  The wheelchair still has a flat,  and I feel lost after
not having the Sumo World ritual in place this time.   The kids never eat
well during a Basho, so that really hasn't changed.

I'm in the mood for a class action suit.

Jude Douglas
Huzayomama